Underwhelming........

So my response to the stim medications has thus far been underwhelming at best.  I have only 9 measurable follicles (potential eggs) as of today (after 5 days of stimming) and my lining is only at a 3 (my lining is at a 2 during my period, so that will give you an idea for a baby to implant it needs to be at about an 8).  So I am feeling a little down about it.  In looking back at the cycle that gave us N and Z (after the same amount of days stimming) I had 15 measurable follicles and my lining was at an 8.  They increased my dose on Monday when I had only 5 measurable follicles and lining at a 3.  I go back again on Friday and I am hopeful that there will be a better response.  Not that 9 eggs would be horrible, but I would prefer more.  With our last cycle we had 14 eggs recovered, 12 were mature, but only 7 fertilized. Of those 7 only 1 made it to blast (N) the other embryo was of a lower grade (no idea what grade) and was "eh" (Z).  So obviously I know that it doesn't take a perfect embryo to turn into a baby.........but knowing that only 2 of ours made it last time makes me worry that with only 9 (thus far) we might have a problem come transfer day.  So I am keeping my fingers crossed, relying upon my Cysters to keep me calm and, hoping I get a pleasant surprise on Friday. 

N had a joint therapy session with his OT and PT today and they worked on crawling with him.  He so wants to crawl!  He has been moving himself around in a circle for a few weeks now and I know that at some point it is going to click that he can go in a straight line too.  I cannot wait for that day! The picture in my mind of both of my boys being able to go where they want and do what they want brings tears to my eyes.  I always feel awful that Z can follow me in the kitchen, open cabinets to pull stuff out and just generally assert his independence whereas N is just stuck where I put him.  (Well he can roll places and move around in a circle, but it's not the same).  I feel like N gets left out and it bothers me, a lot. 

I ordered (upon the recommendation of Z's PT) orthotics for Z.  They are from this site www.cascadedafo.com and we got him the "cricket".   They aren't custom orthotics but Z's PT feels that these might be just what Z needs to finally take off walking.  I hope so.  I would love to be able to take my boys out for a walk and let them both walk.  But until Z is walking on his own, I can't because N needs both my hands for support.  Of course once N's gait trainer arrives we will really be able to go for walks!